How to deal with children who miss home during boarding? Check out the explanation!

Darulmaarif.net – Indramayu, October 1, 2025 | 09.00 WIB

For some santri guardians, leaving children in Islamic boarding schools today is not an easy matter. In the all-digital era, children are accustomed to living close to parents, with device facilities, entertainment, and atmosphere of home full of comfort. So when they start to stay, especially those who are just sitting in grade 1-2, often a sense of homesick is so strong.

Not infrequently children cry, feel lonely, even asking to go home immediately. This condition is reasonable, because they are switching from the family comfort zone to a new environment that is completely regular and full of discipline.

The question is, how do parents respond to the longing without weakening the child’s enthusiasm to survive and proceed in the pesantren?

Understand that missing the house is normal

First of all, parents need to understand that children miss home in pesantren is a natural thing. In fact, this is a sign that children have a strong emotional bond with family. Instead of scolding, parents should provide full support. Say that the longing is normal, and all the students experienced it at the beginning of Mondok.

Build Warm Communication

Although in the pesantren there are certain rules of visits or communication, take advantage of that moment to provide positive energy. Don’t just ask whether the child is homesick, but give motivation, funny stories, or prayers that make the child feel cared for. Simple sentences like “You are proud of you, maintain the spirit” can have a big impact on the psychological child.

Don’t visit or call too often

This might sound heavy, but too often visiting can actually make children more difficult to adapt. Children will feel every time sad, parents will come. Instead, follow the rules of pesantren and maintain enough communication. That way, children learn independently and are slowly accustomed to the pesantren environment.

Help children find new friends

One way to make children feel at home to having close friends. Encourage children to participate in joint activities, both learning, sports, and extracurricular. Peers will be entertainers as well as motivators when homesick comes.

Remind the great purpose of Mondok

Tell children that Mondok is not just far from home, but a noble journey to study religious knowledge. Tell the story of the scholars who also separated from family for the sake of learning. That way, children will have a new perspective that Mondok is part of the struggle, not punishment.

Parents must also be sincere

Often, children find it difficult to feel at home because parents have not really been willing to let go. If parents look anxious or too worried, the child will capture the energy. Instead, show a firm but loving attitude, that Mondok is the best choice for their future.

Longing is temporary, knowledge forever

Overcoming children who miss home when you need patience and strategy. With warm communication, emotional support, and the firmness of parents, children will slowly feel at home and enjoy the life of the pesantren. Remember, the longing of home is only temporary, but the knowledge and morals they get will be a lifetime.

If parents want to provide quality religious education while forming the independence of children, Darul Ma’arif Islamic Boarding School Kaplongan Indramayu open new santri registration. It’s time to leave your child in the best place to grow into a tough and outstanding Islamic generation!

Hope it is useful.